The Niagara Falls is simply a vast amount of water going the wrong way over some unnecessary rocks; the sight of that waterfall must be one of the earliest and keenest disappointments in American married life.
A man can be happy with any woman, so long as he does not love her.
The husbands of very beautiful women usually belong to the criminal classes.
The three women I have most admired are Queen Victoria, Sarah Bernhardt, and Lillie Langtry. The first had great dignity, the second a lovely voice, and the third a perfect figure; I would have married any one of them with the greatest pleasure.
The only real tragedy in a woman's life is that her past is always her lover, and the future is invariably her husband.
In married life, three is company, two is none.
The proper basis for a marriage is mutual misunderstanding.
When a woman marries again, it is because she detested her first husband; when a man marries again; it is because he adored his first wife. Women try their luck, men risk theirs.
I have always been of the opinion that a man about to get married should know either everything or nothing.
Men marry because they are tired, women because they are curious; both are disappointed.
Never love anyone who treats you like you're ordinary.
Oscar At Large
Anyone can sympathize with the sufferings of a friend; it requires a very fine nature to sympathize with a friends' success.
A little sincerity is a dangerous thing, and a great deal of it is absolutely fatal.
Perhaps, after all, America has never been discovered; I prefer to think that is has merely been detected.
Of course America has often been discovered before Columbus, but it was always hushed up.
The youth of America is their oldest tradition; it has been going on now for three hundred years.
If you find a box labelled American Dry Goods, you can be reasonably sure it will contain nothing but their novels.
Education is a wonderful thing, provided you always remember that nothing worth knowing can ever be taught.
It is a very sad thing that nowadays there is so little useless information around.
Ignorance is a rare exotic fruit; touch it, and the bloom, has gone.
The only duty we owe history is to rewrite it.
The English country gentleman galloping after a fox - the unspeakable in pursuit of the inedible.
Democracy is simply the bludgeoning of the people for the people by the people.
Work is the curse of the drinking classes.
Consistency is the last refuge of the unimaginative.
A cynic is a man who knows the price of everything but the value of nothing.
Fashion is what one wears oneself; what is unfashionable is what other people wear.
No great artist ever sees things as they really are; if he did, he would cease to be an artist.
Society often forgives the criminal but it never forgives the dreamer.
There is no such thing as a moral or immoral book; books are well written or badly written.
Examinations consist of the foolish asking questions the wise cannot answer.
Punctuality is the thief of time.
The truth is rarely pure and never simple.
Oscar on Life
The book of life begins with a man and woman in a garden; it ends with revelations.
The good end happily and the bad unhappily; that is what fiction means.
We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.
Experience is the name we all give to our mistakes.
The only thing worse in the world than being talked about is not being talked about.
Children begin by loving their parents. After a time, they judge them; rarely is ever do they forgive them.
The old believe everything; the middle-aged suspect everything; the young know everything.
Nothing succeeds like excess.
In this world there are only two tragedies; one is not getting what one wants, the other is getting it.
To lose one parent may be regarded as a misfortune; to lose both looks like carelessness.
To get back one's youth, one merely has to repeat one's follies.
Young people nowadays assume that money is everything, and when they get older they know it.
It is better to have a permanent income than to be fascinating.
No man is ever rich enough to buy back his past.
A man cannot be too careful in his choice of enemies.
Every great man nowadays has his disciples, but it is always Judas who writes the biography.
On The Importance Of Being Oscar
When I had to fill in the immigration papers, I gave my age as 19, and my profession as genius; I added that I had nothing to declare except my genius.
I have put my genius into my life, whereas all I have put into my work is my talent.
I can resist everything except temptation.
I have very simple tastes; I am always satisfied with the very best.
I like talking to a brick wall; I find it is the only thing that never contradicts me.
Whenever people agree with me, I always feel I must be wrong.
One half of the world does not believe in God, and the other half does not believe in me.
Praise makes me humble, but when I am abused I know I have touched the stars.
I shall have to die, as I have lived, beyond my means.
To regain my youth I wold do anything in the world, except take exercise, get up early, or become respectable.
If this is the way Queen Victoria treats her prisoners, she doesn't deserve to have any.
I shall never makes a new friend in life, though I rather hope to make a few in death.
I have had my hand on the moon; what is the use of trying to rise a little way from the ground?
This wallpaper will be the death of me; one of us will have to go.